"我沒有放棄 也不會離你而去 那怕要分開 我依然等你
我全心全意 等你的消息 總會有一天
你會相信我 我愛你"
rewatched the whole series of xian jian qi xia zhuan. its a beautiful but really sad drama. i rmbed when i first watched it years ago on tv i cried at many episodes. today, i watched. i teared. this drama, gave me the excuse to tear. feeling suffocated, but i cant let it out. i actually felt so terrible that i wanted to ask jy n wn out for a drink.. theres no way i can get drunk n numb myself thou, but perhaps meeting them can take my mind off temporarily, even if its for a mere 2 hrs. i did, but cos of other reasons, we arranged for it to be another day during the teacher's orientation course.
so the drama kept me occupied from the moment i got home, till now. this song from the show, portrays bits of my feelings. not giving up, not leaving, always here waiting. 我知道你了解我的心，我知道其实你很感谢我爱你，我知道其实你是心疼我的，但我也知道你不希望我这样。或许现在的你，宁可我不再爱你。
"no one likes a walking waterfall"
this is so true... this is prob one thing u dislike of me.
sorry i lost it today.. sorry.. these few days i duno why i m emotional too.. pls dont push me away cos of this.. i will and have been putting in a conscious effort. do u see that?
seeing u once a week makes me misses u.. seriously..
does this makes u miss me? i hope u will start to miss me.. i know ure busy... perhaps too busy to even think of me or miss me.. but if there's a moment u do... will u let me know u are missing me?
“留下来的，总是痛苦的“
我还留在原地，所以我还是痛苦着。我知道，这份痛苦，是我自己造成的。是我自己放不开。时间根本没有办法冲淡任何伤口，只要还爱你，我想我没有办法放开。等待变成一个既漫长又痛苦的煎熬。但奇怪的事，我宁愿一直痛苦下去，也不愿忘记你。期待着雨过天晴的那一天。到现在，我还是抱着很大的希望。是我蠢吗？让我这样傻下去，或许会有奇迹出现，对吧？如果，我真的一辈子都只可以这样傻下去，那就让我，一个人去承受这一切吧，让我一个人，来守护我和你之间的一切。让我留下来，你，幸福就好。
我是个爱哭鬼。但从小，我就学会如何怎么为自己擦干泪水。如果有你在身旁为我擦干泪水，甚至吻我，我会很幸福。我可以，一个人流泪，一个人擦干泪水。但我希望当我又开心的事的时候，你愿意让我和你分享快乐。我没有办法，还自己笑容。但我也没有权利，要求你还我笑容。让我，待在你生命里，不管什么位置，只要还存在着，只要我还看得到你，我会撑住的。
It's always ♀ ♡ ♂ Never ♂ ♡ ♀; if only...
