today.. i went to ikea alone.. cos i chance upon a clock which was on offer and i thought i would need it at my work desk in school.. so i went while i was otw home from sch...
and.. i never knew going ikea alone in this state is such a hard thing to bear. i was scanning quickly and walking quickly on the second level. but as i walk my heart gets heavier and heavier.. sadness overwhelming me... going ikea with u was quite a blissful thing.. because when i do i will just be a little reminded that maybe next time we will go shopping together in ikea for our own nest. but today... the same thought but a thought that is full of uncertainty just pricks the heart instead.
it has already been 3+ months already.. but nth has changed. im still as sad as ever. while ure still unable to overcome your own hurdle of accepting me.
honey. even though i said i will wait for u. even though i said i will be willing to undergo all these bitterness. sometimes, i really feel v terrified. very hopeless.
suddenly, as it always comes and goes. inside is really feeling very pressurised now.
i really hope these 3+ months has made things a little better for u towards me. even if its just a 1% improvement. but i dont even know anymore.
It's always ♀ ♡ ♂ Never ♂ ♡ ♀; if only...